#09 Ask Questions: How to talk to Girls Series

19 Jul

Continuing the listening theme. Talking to girls takes some tact. Because some girls just spill out their thoughts to anyone who will listen (or at least an attractive fun guy like you). But others are shy. They need to be asked questions. Doesn’t mean they are boring or bad conversationalists. They just don’t get out there and do the conversation initiation like others do.

So don’t just assume the girl you are with on your first coffee date wants to tell you all about her broken childhood and exciting beach plans and funny dorm mishaps. She might need you to ask some questions to make her feel more comfortable with you first. And don’t overload her with the same. She might not want to hear about your rough childhood, bitter enemies, and ex girls just yet.

How do you know which type she is? I don’t know bro. You just figure it out as you go alone. Awkward silence maybe? But don’t take that as a sign for you to do all the talking. It’s a sign that you should ask better questions. Like what? Well certainly don’t start asking her how her job is or how school is or how many siblings she has. Remember we get asked these questions a thousand times. You are different. You are better than that and you want her to know that.

Here’s a few ideas of interesting, creative, questions.

  • How do you feel about dating a male stripper? (j/k, well you could)
  • In my free time I like to [insert crazy hobby], what do you do in your free time?
  • Would you rather date a fat guy or date an 60 year old runner?
  • If you could wake up tomorrow anywhere in the world where would you be, why would you be there, and who would you bring along with you?
  • What if the only catch was, you’d wake up with nothing, not even clothes on, would that change anything?
  • Ever skinny dipped? Ever broken the law (besides speeding, come on lets be original)?
  • Do you think it’s possible to be “just friends” with someone of the opposite sex?
  • What if they are hot (assuming she says yes to previous)?
  • What if you made out once or twice with them?
  • What’s one thing that you just can’t say no to (then try to tease her by offering it to her all night long)?
  • Ok so do you think really being in love exists? Like real love beyond lust or infatuation or a good friendship? (if so) have you ever been in love?
  • Let’s compare embarrassing stories. Whoever has the most embarrassing stories in three round gets a beer. You go first.
  • So let me get your opinion on something . . . [insert anything interesting to ask opinion about, relationships, food, sex, religion, friends, etc.]?

Ok so now you come up with some ideas. I can’t create them all for you. Use your judgment. If you like conservative, sheltered girls you probably shouldn’t bring up a question about sex on the first day . . . bad idea.

Key takeaway: Introverted girls need you to ask questions, extroverted girls need you to listen.


#01 Introduction: How to talk to Girls Series

#02 Get out there: How to talk to Girls Series

#03 Talk to people who seem more important than you: How to talk to Girls Series

#04 The three second rule: How to talk to Girls Series

#05 Don’t have expectations:  How to talk to Girls Series

#06 Failure is Feedback: How to talk to Girls Series

#07 Be a happy single man: How to talk to Girls Series

#08 Learn to Listen: How to talk to Girls Series

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Posted by on July 19, 2012 in Uncategorized


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